Inside a cheerleaders heart
by barbthebookworm
Summary: Kaylyn isn't your typical cheerleader.She likes it but the teams gone for a week. She wants a day people don't 'stick to the status quo.'What happens when when she gets it through someone, in drama? guess who? and What happens afterwards?
1. Chapter 1

**O.K. By the way I know technically its spelled cheerleader. I think but it's stupid I think it should be one word and I'll keep it that way here. (This is her point of view of course unless I change it ) and I don't own High school musical.I may get stuck for a while but I plan to continue this story. I don't like to leave stories unfinished. This will be cute I hope to let you know. And I know not much going on but gotta give you feel of her . **

As I walk down the hall to cheerleading practice outside I think. As a kids getting water from the water fountain I about bump into him .He looks annoyed and glares at me. "Sorry." I mumble to him.

Cheerleading what can I say. Well it's fun usually. The girls are mostly nice. The thing is yeah I see them at cheerleading stuff like practice and games and such, but other then that I don't seem them much. We have fun at sleepovers but we don't call each other or anything. I don't know why.

We get along I guess we just haven't really… clicked as well. I like cheerleading I do, the games are great and practices O.K. though some can get a bit... not so O.K. (mostly trying to figure out what to do for future halftime), and the sleepovers are fun. The work can be hard sometimes but I do it anyways.

Some people think cheerleading's so easy and I'm not saying it's as hard as some stuff but you have to learn all these moves and words for cheers, not to mention dances, work on stunts, try and be flexible and be able to do jumps while yelling during a game so it's good to try and be fit for it. It's also helpful of course to eat healthy and drink water.

I practice the cheers dances and everything a lot. I'm loud at the games. I'm not perfect the words are mostly good but sometimes hard to put everything together. Overall though I try and do my best.I'm a bit early so I decide to write part of my speech. See my mom is making me join speech class and I have my icebreaker, a speech about myself soon so I decide to work on it.

" Hello my name is Kaylyn .I'm sixteen years old and I've been living in the area since I was 2. I was born in Colorado but my parents could not stand so much snow and such so they moved here. I'm almost a bit sad, it sounds really pretty there. I have a little sister named Amber. I like to watch movies. My favorite is Tim Burton's Corpse Bride. My favorite food is mashed potatoes. I like to cheer for the wildcats. I've got some funny sayings I get from my mom, like whatever floats your boat, stick to your guns and random stuff like that. "

I got that done before practice started. Hey give me a break I'm not bad at writing I just had a few minutes! We practiced cheers and then they talked for a while. It has been going well, bit of drama about future stunt ideas and stuff. Some people won't be here then and things like that so it gets tough to schedule things sometimes.

Basketball is over with of course since it's March, So not as much to do but still gotta keep in the game and it's just few last practices until we stop and we'll start late summer to get ready for football. We don't cheer for baseball. They were talking about this cheerleading camp they're going too. I'm not going. See to go you had to fundraise stuff, and I couldn't go to that. I wanted to go but oh well. Coach just had to stick to her guns. (See like in my speech!).

Oh well. Mostly what I'm worried about is where am I going to sit during lunch? I know that sounds shallow but other then the cheerleaders I have nowhere to sit. Everyone else is practically " Cheerleaders are dumb and trashy."

Except jocks are okay but the girls would suddenly think I'm dating some of them or something. Then the girls might get mad at me because if I did, I would try to talk to the guys and the squad would think I'm wanting to steal their crushes. Or they would squeal and ask if I mentioned any of them and what they said I know that may sound assuming but it's true .I don't want that.

Now you're probably wondering why I stay in cheerleading. Well I do like it and have a feeling it'll get better soon. I don't know why. Just the girls are a bit not relateable with me at times and everyone else thinks I'm some clone or something. It really stinks no one says anything to us but still.

Anyways I guess I'll find somewhere to sit. I do know people but just not that well. You know what I wish? I was there was another day like the day we had a while back when groups broke out of their shell.

I remember that guy Zeke said that he likes to bake. That's pretty cool. It's a pretty useful thing to know. It's better then starving or burnt food. I always burn popcorn I don't know why. Anyways then there was Martha. She likes to dance. Now that was a bit strange to see, but whatever floats your boat.

Then there's that skater dude - I can't remember his name, we don't exactly travel in the same circles. He played the cello. The cello. I am not kidding. While I think instrument playing is a cool skill I have to admit the cell is a different choice. But again...Oh I don't need to say it. Anyways it would be so neat to have a repeat of that day and maybe someone would figure out I'm not some cheerleader clone that only cares about pyramids, clothes, and the jocks.

While I think basketball is a pretty cool sport since I cheer for it, I think I would get tired of talking about basketball and school all the time. It's good to have then just basketball. The few guys, who had different hobbies on the team, happened to be Troy and Zeke. Troy found he liked singing, but he found it came along with Gabriella they've been going out ever since the musical, while Zeke was the one who liked to bake, but he also has an interest strangely in Sharpay the Drama Queen. The rest of the team is all basketball. Not that it's all bad but just not my thing. Well I need to write the rest of my speech!


	2. Chapter 2

Wednesday morning, it's halfway to the weekend. Today is my first day where I have no idea where to sit for lunch, because the cheerleaders are gone for camp. It's only for a few days. I'll just figure something out I guess. School went by slowly. I feel people's eyes on me wondering why I'm still here. It's weird. Finally after math, and history and a bunch of boring classes, it's lunch. I'm sorta half and half feeling about this whole thing.. I try and look on the bright side, maybe someone would ask me to sit with them.

I could ask to sit with someone. It's not like I would be asking to completely join their group, just to sit there for a few minutes while I eat my lunch and maybe a bit of conversation. I walk in the lunchroom and get my food. After that I look around and a few kids are pointing. Well I guess I can't blame them. They must think it's weird all the cheerleaders are gone except for me. I figure I don't want to ask to sit with people if all they're going to do is stare at me.

So I sit at a table by myself. I was eating my lunch quietly when I hear the random voices around the lunchroom, I hear stomps coming near me I look around and there's Ryan Evans. Ryan Evans is in Drama. He is the lead in about every play with his sister. Well until the last musical where it was Troy Bolton and the new girl Gabriella Montez. That was surprising. My sister had to go see them.

He comes and says quickly " Hi I'm Ryan we haven't officially met, but can I sit there? I need a break from my sister... " He was fidgeting a bit at first, but as he saw I understood he stopped. I nodded and answer. " Sure. I'm Kaylyn.I know how sisters can be, I have a younger one myself." He laughed as he sat down. " Well I'm sure mine could be yours... mine has a bit of a reputation. "

I grinned and replied, "That's true. " He smiles and looks at me strangely and asks, " So, I'm not meaning to be rude but how come you didn't go to the cheerleading camp?" " I missed fundraising so I couldn't go. " I said quietly.

"Eh that stinks but." " But what? And why do you say eh? Are you Canadian or something? ": I asked quickly. This guy seems to have a sense of humor so I don't think anything about it. . He pretends to look all offended." Well I just happen to like that word. It describes things well, and I was going to say at least you were here, if not I might have been stuck with Sharpay." 

"Eh" I said imitating him " Whatever floats your boat I guess." He gives me a look and I burst out laughing. " That's totally the pot calling the kettle back." He said pointedly. " We're just overflowing with funny sayings are we? " I asked laughing. " Yeah I don't know why people quit saying them." He said seriously.

" I don't know either, they're so neat." I answered. I was about done with my lunch sadly; I was having fun talking to Ryan. " I never expected a cheerleader and I would have something in common. " He teased. I glared at him for a second then.

" Gee thanks, put down my extracurricular activity while I'm saving you from your sister. " I jab at him. " Well I just didn't expect to have something like that the same as with a cheerleader, you seem cool but the others... and I could have sat... " He trailed off and smiled obviously not knowing what to say. " With the teachers? " I say somehow with a straight face.

" No." He said with a glare. " Okay you have me there. You're not going to shun me there now are you?" He asked quickly trying to look sad and I replied " No but I'm surprised you're so against it." I said with a smirk. "Well on that note randomly most of them are well you know, except for Mrs. Darbus sometimes, and she would ramble on about drama stuff I would only hear again later. " He replied as he took a bite finally out of his sandwich. I nodded. That is true. Darbus loved her drama ramblings.

" Yeah it's true with the girls being different I was just messing with you mostly. I don't like how everyone puts us together thinking we're all jock chasers and overachievers with stunts. They're mostly nice but..." Now it was obviously my turn to not to know what to say. I didn't want to diss them and his grin at my discomfort after he sipped his soda made it harder.

I couldn't take it after a few seconds. " You know what I mean. But I'm glad you prefer me to the teachers. Or the other drama kids right now" I say with a smile and end with a bit of a frown. He looks at me and thinks." Yeah I can see where you come from, people can label me too with drama. I know how some of them can be, and really at least with me all I want to do is acting and stuff, I don't want to be a jerk to people because I'm in drama."

" Yeah. I just like cheering and I'm not exactly like them but oh well. So truce?" I asked hopefully. He grinned and replied " If you do one thing Kaylyn.You come to a show this weekend and meet and hang out with a few drama people afterwards. That's my condition. "

" What? Why?" I cried." 'Sitting with the teachers ' come on Kaylyn, that was harsh." He said pointedly "If I have too..." I said in a monotone voice. Man maybe I'm a better actress then I thought with a grin." You have too. " He stated simply. " Fine" I pretend to grumble " But on one of my conditions as well. " I say menacingly as inspiration hit. He looks surprised but in the next instant he was suspicious.

" What would that be? " He asked. " Patience is a virtue Ryan, you'll see... " He glared at me but before he could ask anymore I got up from the table with my finished lunch. I heard footsteps and another sound not yet identifiable yet when I saw it was Ryan following me closely and he had stuffed all his food in his mouth.

After he had finished chewing his food and swallowing " What's your condition Kaylyn? " He asked trying to sound harsh. I ignored him. Obviously he wasn't going to take that because he kept following me. " Come on Ryan, I have to at least stick up for my team; it's what us wildcats do. So I won't tell you what but it will involve the cheerleaders, which is enough. Since obviously you're trying to help me respect the drama some since I'll be hanging out with them afterwards. , I hope to get you to respect cheering at least a little bit."

"I at least let you know my torture-I mean enlightening was going to be." He replied instantly. "Yeah", I agreed, " But you'll see soon and if you keep asking..." I grinned. " Fine I won't ask what is it but one please of what it's not.." He paused and looked at my face for an okay. I nodded. " Promise me you're not going to drag me to cheerleading practice." He said solemnly.

" No." I laughed. " Good." He sighed. " I don't think I think I could be the bottom of a pyramid." He joked. I laughed just as the bell rang and started for my class

" So I'll see you tomorrow lunch same table?" He called to me as I was on my way. " Sure!"

Wow if you would have told me last moth I would be sitting with Ryan Evans all by myself at lunch and been joking with him like we had been friends for a long time, you might have had another thing coming.


	3. Chapter 3

The next day I realized I only had a few more days of the cheerleaders being gone, well on school days anyways. They are coming back Sunday. So today I'm sitting with Ryan, I guess I'll see tomorrow. Tomorrow I've got the show. I wonder which one it is? I guess I'll ask Ryan.It was weird how we connected. I guess since I can't joke with the cheerleaders like I could with him.

I guess him coming over just broke the ice, and I doubt he can do it that much with Sharpay, maybe some. I wonder how much he can. Along the lines of Sharpay … maybe I could find a flier about the show. I looked but I couldn't find anything. Darn. Math was okay Social studies was boring, same with study hall. I was pretty sure Biology and Spanish were going to be the same old same old .I'm glad lunch is soon.

I got my food and decided on a grilled cheese sandwich and some corn chips. I had just sat down at my table when not two seconds later Ryan comes up and says cheerfully " Hey Kaylyn!" "Hey Ryan!" I replied smiling at him." So have you talked to Sharpay?" I tried to ask for the sake of the conversation.

"She's a bit ticked I left her yesterday I'm hoping soon she'll get over it. " He calmly said as he started eating. I nodded." That's good it's kinda weird you two are fighting and how we're getting along so well, in a good way of course. You know what I mean? " I asked trying to sound casual.

He looked at me with a bit of humor in his eyes " Well it's a bit harder to have humor with Sharpay, She doesn't get sarcasm a lot. And I guess with you, I remembered the thought ' Laughter is the best medicine.' You looked a bit lonely, it might have been just use to seeing you with the cheerleaders though. Anyways I could tell you wouldn't take it the wrong way or anything."

I let that sink in for a moment; it was just about the same as mine. " Wow another thing you have in common with a cheerleader. I was thinking about the same thing with the reason why we were making jokes so easily." I teased. "Really? Wow. I never would have expected two days in a row." He grinned. " I didn't either." I confessed. "So," Ryan breathed after a moment and ending with a smidgen of curiosity in the end of his next statement. " What happens with the cheerleaders when you try and use your sense of humor on them?"

" Oh well not all the time but sometimes if it's sarcasm I get the stare." I replied easily and tried my best to imitate it. "Maybe I can see it for real whenever I do the thing with the cheerleaders. I'm not sure but it sounds like the one I get sometimes from Sharpay. I like how you didn't give it a name, just THE stare. " He commented with a bit of a mischievous smile on her face. " Thanks. Maybe. Don't try to go guessing or anything. For all you know I could be having you train to be a mascot months from now, or I could be planning to invade the drama room and have all of us attack you with pom-poms, make up a hate cheer for you... The list could go on and on." I laugh evilly.

He laughs as well and looks seriously in mock horror " Please, spare me – Anything but the pom-poms!" He cried rising up his hands in defeat. " Don't push me too hard, I've got a weapon of my own, I'm not on the best terms but I think I can fix that soon. I could have Sharpay stomp on your foot with her heels, have her convince Mrs. Darbus to hold you after school for a lecture, sick her little dog on you… The list could go on and on." He said imitating me. " How come you didn't do my evil laugh?" I asked surprised.

" I don't do evil laughs. I read on suggestions for evil villains and one of them was cutting back evil laughter, I think it's a good idea, especially for people I'm not sure can be trusted yet." He said slyly. " Oh is that where Sharpay gets her evil plans? Oh keep in mind I make a bad enemy." I said and grinned then went on, " Well since you messed it up I still must continue." I said dramatically. " No! Anything but Mrs. Darbus!" I cried mocking Ryan; I don't think I did a bad job. Unfortunately for us Mrs. Darbus heard that last bit and glared at us. I guess I can't blame her.

We had to wait then were laughing to ourselves eating a bit then and continued our conversation again. " So to move on to a subject that won't get us into detention… Do you really make up cheers? That would be so cool if you had done some of those classic ones like the oh let me think…" He trailed off. That caught me off guard. I hastily replied " No I haven't written any you've heard… I have written some though. Not that great but at least a step up from the two four six eight stuff. The other girls are bit busier so never got around to doing anything with it." " Ah too busy admiring the jocks maybe?" He asked teasingly.

" Sometimes. You don't even know…" I said shaking my head with a sarcastic smile on my face. I decided to move on " So what's the show you're forcing me to come too?" I asked quickly. Hey it was worth a shot right? " You'll see." He grinned. " I have to keep some mystery too, can't let someone have all the fun of keeping the other in suspense …" I looked at him shaking my head at him. "Not only that but almost keeping them awake all night trying to figure it out but realizing their sister would kill him in cold blood if they did that because they can't bags under their eyes." He continued. This made me laugh out loud pretty loudly.

" It's not that bad Ryan." I argued. " Maybe for you it's not… but as long as it's not pom-poms or the pyramid." He cringed. " Oh can the performer not handle holding up one little cheerleader? " I asked trying to look innocent. I got an evil look in return and I couldn't help but start giggling.

"Well one or two maybe but the whole squad? You've gotta give me a break, only so much a guy can take." He said trying to look pathetic. "And you need to give me a break then. You'll know soon. I'm telling you it's not either of thosehorrid things," I grinned and put emphasis on horrid and then continued, " As long as the show won't be in another language or something or be like five hours long without stopping. That's my limit." I said seriously. " It's not." He confirmed.

I was finishing up eating when he added seriously "By the way I wasn't kidding when I said I would try and fix things with Sharpay today I think hopefully we'll be able to talk about it better, we had an argument about things so hopefully now it's fixed we can talk about it ." He said simply before sipping his coke.

"Tomorrow maybe I'll eat with her so we can talk about things coming up a bit maybe, you can come too if you want. Unless eating lunch and seeing the show tomorrow and everything with the drama kids would be too much for you." He said teasingly. "Maybe." I said grinning back. We just had enough time to throw away our stuff and get to class. "Bye Kaylyn see you sometime tomorrow!" Ryan called as I ran to gym I smiled and waved back.


	4. Chapter 4

**Here we go , a bit of details before it actually gets into what happens. And I know I maybe should have had conversation with drama people and her but I didn't maybe later if you guys want.If you would review please I was thinking you guys would maybe like a change of not asking for reviews but that hasn't worked so please review if you like this. **

Today was the day. I was actually excited. I wondered if I should go sit with the drama kids. I was debating on it back and forth. I mean I wonder why he invited me. Well obviously being nice and wanting me to know his group isn't all bad I guess .I thought about it more and I decided too. The drama kids aren't that bad and I'll know Ryan at least .I could always up the punishment on him if it was that bad I thought and grinned.

Actually what I had planned wasn't that bad. I am simply going to bring him to the cheerleader table for lunch when the cheerleaders' get back. You may think " So what? " But really you don't know the Wildcat cheerleaders. Although they typically go for the jocks,if a male is brought to the table and a talented attractive one like Ryan, they will be all over him.

I guess it's kind of ironic He's making me watch a show by myself (Well unless someone comes I know) and then dinner with people .I'm making him eat lunch with people (All I need is to make him watch some cheerleading tape or something afterward to be truly ironic)and I'm the one who was by myself and people are the first thing he wants to do to see his group isn't so bad. Yet he came from people yet his first eye-opener is observing. I don't know if that made sense. Well I was pretty bored during announcements.

School was the usual. I'm glad it's Friday. Finally lunch came and I'm glad it did. I went to lunch and tried to not take too long in the line. I found Ryan and he waved me over. "Hey Kaylyn I saved a seat for you! " He called. I waved back and repeated in my head ' you've been invited it's O.K ... they'll be nice to you or you can kill Ryan later…'As I sat down Ryan began saying " Everyone, This is Kaylyn. Kaylyn this is Sharpay, I'm sure you've heard of her, and this is : Matt, Abby, Sarah, Josie ,Andy ,Kelsey and Trey."

" Hi " I said politely. Sharpay looked at me for a minute strangely and said " So you're Kaylyn. Why aren't you with the other cheerleaders? " She asked .I replied with a grin at the end " I missed the fund-raiser so I couldn't go. It kind of stinks I couldn't go but then Ryan might have been intimidated to come to the table with all of them there." And it would probably escalate after I was done with him. I thought. "Hey!" Ryan called and I laughed

Sharpay nodded absentmindedly while Ryan was eating his food, the other kids were mostly talking I heard something about props. I ignored them and asked " So Sharpay do you know anything about this show tonight? " I asked. Hey I had to say something. I figured I could try and get them talking about the show maybe.

Sharpay looked up and was about to answer when he interrupted with "Nice try Kaylyn. Don't tell her Sharpay. See this is what we're doing, We talked a bit about Cheerleaders and Drama people and we both thought mostly each others groups weren't so bad we decided to have a truce about it and she's coming to the show and hang out afterwards and she said I have to do something with the cheerleaders but she won't tell me what so I had to keep some part of it a secret from her. I honestly think I'm getting the bad end of the deal. " Ryan rambled on with a joke towards the end.

" He's so stubborn. " I say with a sigh and Sharpay piped up " Believe me I know. " shaking her head. I was surprised a bit but went on," If it turns out to scar you for life then I'm sure we can work something out." I said matter-of-factly." Like you pay for my therapist? " He asked eagerly. " Well I don't know if I could do that but I could BE your therapist. " I stated.

Ryan looked at me skeptically and I continued, " Hey my aunt was a therapist I could probably do a fair job."" I think that might be a conflict of interest since you caused it." Ryan pointed out. " True. " I shook my head and concluded, " Well I guess I could try and get a discount with my aunt..." I then talked to a few of the drama kids they seem pretty cool. So that in an enlarged nutshell except towards the end was lunch the rest of school was the usual.

I had already told my mom about it and she was cool about it so I guess I had to find Ryan and figure out about this show. Ryan caught up with me after school and draws " So are you ready for this Kaylyn? "" As long as Miss Darbus's speeches before shows are shorter..." I joked. " Hello Miss Darbus how are you today? "Ryan suddenly politely asked.

I turned my head sharply and saw no one. I glared at Ryan when I turned my head back around. " I'll get you for that. " I threatened. "Well see " Ryan smugly replied. " I almost thought it would be like last time." I laughed then continued " Well if it had been her I might have gotten detention and then, tragically, not been able to go to the show. " Ryan grinned at me " Come on it won't be THAT bad." Ryan countered. "True " I agreed. " And my mom might not be happy with me getting in detention so I guess it's a good thing. "

He laughed at that one and started leading me to the drama room avoiding the bulletin board. " How come I didn't see anything about this on the bulletin board or hear any announcements?" I asked curiously. "Well we didn't want a bunch of people for this particular one. We kinda had to convince Darbus and she agreed as long as it wasn't too big." He explained. I nodded as we headed toward the auditorium when we finally got there and Ryan cleared his throat and said " Well Here we go this was written by one of the people in here who is talented at writing."

He paused then continued. " You can go get your seat and since my delivery job is done I need to go get ready! Enjoy the show Kaylyn, Don't run off after remember our deal! " He called as he ran off " O.K. Thanks Ryan, Don't worry I won't. Break a leg! " So I decided to sit down and enjoy the show, and to add some humor later I decided to sit in the very front row. For what's going to happen to Ryan with the cheerleaders I might as well enjoy this like he said since he most likely won't. I sound cruel but like I said if it's that bad I'll give him a fair chance. I'm not that heartless. 


	5. Chapter 5

The show was really fun. I actually had a few of the kids I met in drama sit near me so it was cool. I asked why they weren't in the show and a girl said that they wanted a break until the next show. So we talked a bit and it was nice. They had some complications so it started later than expected. The show which I thought would be a play, turned out to be a concert basically. Some guy surprised us by going up there and doing "Soulja Boi" of course including the dance. He was good too. Honestly I had to laugh at that. It was just hilarious.

Sharpay went up and sang "Everywhere" by Michelle Branch which was really good .A bit different for her, but she did well she sounded more toned down too, she went for the look of Michelle Branch which she pulled off really well. She looked and did better than before actually. She had pulled her hair in a cute side ponytail and wore black pants with a light pink long sleeve shirt with slits in the sleeves and a big necklace.

Anyways Sarah and Andy then went up and sang "Missing you" from Tyler Hilton and Taylor Swift and did well mostly, Andy could have been better but you have to cut him some slack. Matt did Sadie Hawkins dance, he was a bit much with the air guitar though and the oh oh oh! Well let's say the other parts of the song went better. Sharpay and Ryan did "All you need is love" like in Across the Universe. That was really awesome. Abby did "I don't wanna go." which she did well on. The high notes weren't a problem. I was almost surprised everyone did so well some of these people being new but I guess they've had time to practice.

Ryan did "I want you to want me" He did really well I was surprised of his song choice but it fit well with him. I watched him; he wore a black and white hat, which is what always stands out with him. It looked classic and cool like how he did the song. I think it was actually from Bop to the top. There were some interruptions of Miss Darbus which made it take longer. After It was all over Ryan bounces on down - well not literally and blurts out "So what did you think" 'Lynn? " "Lynn? " I asked. He shrugs and smiles and asks "Is that O.K.?" "Yeah." I say quickly with a slight smile. "Soo.. Quit stalling! The show wasn't that bad was it? "Ryan grins and jabs at me."I thought it was good I DO remember hearing someone wrote it up could you help me not be confused about that?" I questioned.

" Oh! " He exclaims " I didn't know how much a concert put together in two weeks would appeal to you so I called it a show , and Kelsey arranged the song order ." He explained with a laugh. I shook my head and grinned and droned at first but ended nicely "Ryan Ryan Ryan... You could have just said concert." We chatted for a bit with the others about the show. Soon we talked and eventually decided to go to Pizza Hut.

The ride was pretty funny. Actually mostly BEFORE the ride was headed to Ryan's car, a green jeep with Sharpay . I was prepared to get in the back when Ryan walks to the passenger seat unlocks the door and says firmly " Kaylyn you're the guest you get to ride in the front." I hesitate but then get in. Sharpay glares at Ryan for a few seconds but then she shrugs her shoulders and goes and finds another ride.

"Well I'm glad I came , I thought it was all really good especially for two weeks. Did you like me in the front Ryan? " I ask with a smile as I put on my seatbelt. " I did "He smiled.I reached for it but it was stuck 'You're not holding your mouth right. " Ryan joked. " What?" I say "Not holding your mouth right, It's another old saying I thought you knew all of those." He teased.

"Don't become the old adages police." I said dryly as I finally got it. We talked about nothing some more and went inside and it was great. Someone started a napkin fight which was funny when someone hit Ryan. After a little bit we went home to rest up for the busy Saturdays. Well most. I'm sure I'll find something to do...

Monday Monday ... so good to me. Well I don't know if I'd want to sing that, THAT much but it does feel like that kinda. It's pretty cool the cheerleaders are back. They had a lot of fun and it's cool to hear the stories I feel a bit sad I couldn't go but can't change it now. Mostly what I'm working on is figuring out how to get my idea through.

I eventually talk to them and they are a bit curious about it but we actually decide do it right away.I find Ryan before lunch grab his arm and simply make a motion and simply say "Come." He looks confused obviously but he comes so I'm happy.

Later I came back from the bathroom to hear the girls talking to Ryan and a few " 'So Ryan could you teach me to act?' Kaylyn said you sang I want you to want me for a drama thing .. Could you sing it now? I love that song!' 'I'll bet all that rehearsal gets to be hard after a while... We should hang out sometime!' " I have to fight my giggles as Ryan glances back at me and glares at me darkly.

Later after Ryan's lunch date with the entire cheerleading squad I was at my locker putting my books up when he came behind me. "You owe me .One of them tried to take my hat! And another stole my phone and got my number! What if she won't leave me alone " "Fine on a bad point I'm actually broke I went shopping with my mom this weekend so I think the therapist is out.. " I state simply. Trying not to think about the strange emotion that came up when he mentioned the other cheerleader who now had his phone number. Who was it? "Oh I have something else in mind .. " Ryan stated bringing her back to reality ""What?" I asked quickly. "You can't know yet ..but you will soon." I raise an eyebrow at him and start "Ryan... " "Yes Kaylyn ? " He responds instantly sing -songed mockingly with a big grin on his face.

"You want me to do an act in the talent show?" I echo Ryan back dumbfounded.  
" Yeah. It was a few days later I had been bored waiting for a ride back from cheerleading practice so I called him. After talking about school and small talk I finally got the answer out of him. Right then my mom pulled up, finally.. Traffic must have been bad. "Look Ryan I gotta go , But can we talk about this later? " I ask quickly as my mom is gesturing me into the car "Sure no problem "Ryan replies "See you tomorrow at school! "

I sat listening to music, that was randomly ,from my sister, while painting my nails. I love painting them. it's one of the things we can do with cheerleading . I like it because they tell us to wear the same outfits and do all the same moves and words. Not that it's all about me but I like to have something to be able to recognize me from the others  
At first I wasn't really listening but as my nails had to dry I listened more and a song came on I had to look up. It was so cute. It's by Taylor Swift, I've heard a bit of her before I remember I thought it was cool they had Tyler who was cute in the teardrops on my guitar video.

Anyways this may be cliche but I looked up the words to the song and it mostly describes my relationship with Ryan but he doesn't know it. I remember when he took me to eat after the show and he about made Sharpay sit in the back but she caught a ride somewhere else. I remember how he kept on making jokes and sometimes I would space out thinking about how great he did and smiling and having to ask him to repeat it .

I don't think that passenger seat Has ever looked this good to me He tells me about his night And I count the colors in his eyes He'll never fall in love he swears As he runs his fingers through his hair I'm laughing cause I hope he's wrong I don't think it ever crossed his mind He tells a joke I fake a smile That I know all his favorite songs And..

_[chorus:]_  
I could tell you his favorite color's green He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes And if you asked me if I love him,I'd lie He looks around the room Innocently overlooks the truth Shouldn't a light go on? Doesn't he know that I've had him memorized for so long? He sees everything black and white Never let nobody see him cry I don't let nobody see me wishing he was mine

_[chorus]_He stands there then walks away My god if I could only say I'm holding every breath for you...He'd never tell you but he can play guitar I think he can see through everything But my heart First thought when I wake up is My god he's beautiful So I put on my make up And pray for a miracleYes I could tell you his favorite color's green He loves to argue oh and it kills me His sisters beautiful he has his father's eyes And if you asked me if I love him If you asked me if I love him I'd lie

Alright so I am not sure love is the right word but I like him a lot. But still I am nervous about the whole talent show thing. What if I mess up? I don't know if I could handle it … How am I going to not do this? Ryan is wanting to make me do. I tried telling him I would buy him hats instead…but he wasn't going for it. "Quit trying to get out of it. " They weren't that bad!" " Aside from the fact I will always have ringing in my ears from the high pitched giggling among a few other things . Your experience wasn't as bad really I am saving you. I don't want to have your giggle to pierce my ears like theirs does. You should thank me really. I looked down grumbling. Little did Kaylyn know the real reason for wanting to do the talent show.

"So Lynn any idea what song you want to do? That is the hardest part you know. " " Ryan asked nonchalantly looking at me then at his crusty meatloaf and potatoes. I instantly thought of the song.. But no I couldn't do that one. What if someone guessed? I don't think Ryan likes me like that and I wouldn't want it to be weird Maybe another Taylor Swift one. Or maybe not. A lot of them are about love." Hmm.. I really like "Wrong baby wrong" by Martina McBride? That's a good one I think. " "Sweet that is a good one. I can give you Kelsey's phone number and she can work with you on it.

There is a while before the show but Kelsey has a lot of people to work with. "He explains as he writes it down on a napkin. I take it. Can I really do this? Ryan gives me a look "Don't lose it. " He orders. I laugh. Apparently I don't have a choice…I might as well get ready then! "Alright!" I hold up my hands in surrender. I put it in my purse.4 months later…

I have worked on the song with Kelsey a lot. It is the week of the show. We've become closer…in a way I think too close and other ways not close enough. I am torn. I was thinking the slight feelings might go away but they haven't. I wish they weren't. It makes things so complicated. I kind of get mixed signals. What if I'm it's cool to hang out but just not enough to date?

I don't know if I could handle it. What if he likes one of the other cheerleaders and is hoping to meet some of the others through me later? I have hung out with the drama people and he has come to a few cheerleading things.. going better then the first time when his hat got stole among other things he complained about..or was it just his sarcasm? I am thinking about this as I am with Kelsey practicing. She is playing the piano , and my mind is elsewhere . We've practiced a lot . It is hard for me but Kelsey has told me I've improved a lot. I like the song but after singing it a lot… I will be glad after the talent show is over.

"Hey Kaylyn?" Kelsey asks. I come out of my train of thought "Yeah the last part was good. I think it could help to sing something else to give you a break. What would you like to sing? I know singing the same song over and over again can get tiring. I wouldn't mind a change of pace either." She noted brightly. I hadn't noticed the music had stopped playing . I didn't have to think long. I have recently become obsessed with the song I'd lie. I tell Kelsey this and I can't help but think about Ryan. I feel embarrassed as the song ends Kelsey made a remark interrupts my thoughts again with "If you could connect with your song like you did then you'll win the talent show." I blush instantly.

"I guess I just like the song" I start looking at my music papers a lot. " Oh really? Any particular reason why?" Kelsey asked laughing. " No reason." I start grabbing my stuff to go but Kelsey didn't let it drop. " Just like in the song… I have a feeling you DO like the song for a reason…and that reason is a certain someone we both know" Kelsey grinned. "No ...I gotta go"

Distracted I quickly left this was getting to be too much for me. You don't know the half if it I sighed rounding the corner. I had entertained of changing the song… Surely he would understand I would be singing about him? But could I do it? I don't think so. I wasn't brave enough. It was my obsession with Taylor Swift that made me change my mind. I finally letter she wrote to her fans. She wrote about speaking now even if you're scared …reminding us that the words you most regret saying are the ones either you hurt someone or that you hold back.

'Speak now or forever hold your peace,' the words said by preachers at the end of wedding ceremonies all over the world, right before the vows. It's a last chance for protest, a moment that makes everyone's heart race, and a moment I've always been strangely fascinated by. So many fantasize about bursting into a church, saying what they'd kept inside for years like in the movies. In real life, it rarely happens.

Real life is a funny thing, you know. In real life, saying the right thing at the right moment is beyond crucial. So crucial, in fact, that most of us start to hesitate, for fear of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. But lately what I've begun to fear more than that is letting the moment pass without saying anything. I think most of us fear reaching the end of our life, and looking back regretting the moments we didn't speak up. When we didn't say 'I love you.' When we should've said 'I'm sorry.' When we didn't stand up for ourselves or someone who needed help.

These songs are made up of words I didn't say when the moment was right in front of me. There songs are open letters. Each is written with a specific person in mind, telling them what I meant to tell them in person. To the beautiful boy whose heart I broke in December. To my first love who I never thought would be my first heartbreak. To my band. To a mean man I used to be afraid of. To someone who made my world very dark for a while. To a girl who stole something of mine. To someone I forgive for what he said in front of the whole world.

Words can break someone into a million pieces, but they can also put them back together. I hope you use yours for good, because the only words you'll regret more than the ones left unsaid are the ones you use to intentionally hurt someone. What you say might be too much for some people. Maybe it will come out all wrong and you'll stutter and you'll walk away embarrassed, wincing as you play it all back in your head. But I think the words you stop yourself from saying are the ones that will haunt you the longest.

So say it to them. Or say it to yourself in the mirror. Say it in a letter you'll never send or in a book millions might read someday. I think you deserve to look back on your life without a chorus of resounding voices saying 'I could've, but it's too late now.' There is a time for silence. There is a time waiting your turn. But if you know how you feel, and you so clearly know what you need to say, you'll know it. I don't think you should wait. I think you should speak now. Taylor Swift

I decided … knowing would be better than not knowing. So I call Kelsey. " Hey Kelsey. It's me Kayln"I say timidly at first. I am not going to back down… just because I have goosebumps does not mean I am going to change my mind. "Hi. What's up Kaylyn?" "Umm.." I started off stuttering. "You know what we talked about the other day kinda? I think I want to change songs.

I've been thinking and it's the message I wanna sing." I say in a rush. " Oh that is awesome! I think you'll do great it's different then what we've practiced but your singing has improved and we still have time…" She went on about the song. We talked a bit more then She had to go work on homework and I decided to practice. If I was gonna do this I was gonna do it right..

1 week later…Talent show night

I can't believe it …I am so nervous. Ryan has been doing last minute things to get ready but he was really supportive as always... He wrote me a note and put it in my locker saying Break a leg and how I was going to do great. I hope he's right. I hope after tonight we will still be close. After tonight Sharpay will calm down and not hold him hostage for practice as long as she does. Which will be nice so we can hang out more.. I've missed him all week. I wish I could tell him that... If he will still want to spend time with me after what I tell him tonight I will let him know I missed him. I wonder if he missed me at all.

I finally get myself to calm down. I wait in the ugly brown chairs while I wait to go backstage. Thankfully I am not first but after several acts. I wouldn't want to be last. I want to get this over with. Of course then I will probably be jittery wondering what people think –specifically Ryan. The first acts were pretty good, a violin player , a girl singing a Pocahontas song while another girl played the flute along with a comedian who was funny. My girls are here for me and smile and cheer as well as giving me thumbs up as I go up on stage and Kelsey takes her place at the piano.

I try and make out people from the stage but it is difficult. I decide to just stare at the clock. I hear the music start and miraculously do not miss my cue. "I don't think that passenger seat has ever looked this good to me…" Soon the song is over. I am surprised I didn't pass out but I am still standing. I get a good applause the loudest from the cheerleaders. Relieved, they may have liked the song...But what about when people's wheels in their head get turning? I get off the stage and sigh. It is done; I can't take it back now. Here's to hoping I won't be laughed at later. The rest of the show wasn't really eventful for the most part. Sharpay did "So what" By pink which was the most surprising –yet very good ones.

Ryan did John Mayor's Waiting on the world to change. I am surprised we didn't have all the cell phones out going back and forth like people do at concerts since we don't have lighters. He was that good. Well that was my opinion anyways. We hang out and talk for a while. We eventually decide t o go get a milkshake and we are talking. This was after Ryan almost ran me over with a hug. "You did amazing!" He gushed. "You did too" I grinned and told him. I spot Kelsey giving me a knowing look. I smile at her. "Really I didn't expect your song at all I thought you wanted to do Martina?" " I changed my mind I liked this one better." I shrugged. I couldn't tell him just yet. After we were at my house after getting the milkshakes with people from drama- I had talked to the cheerleaders and they had already left. He brings it up again. "I can't believe you kept it from me you were changing the song.

If you hadn't done so great, I probably would have said we're not even." Ryan teased looking at me before looking back at the road. "Taylor spoke to me." I said quietly. Here it comes. " Oh really?" He looks amused at me. "Yeah, she did. From this." I quietly said as I tried to control my voice I have so many emotions running through me now. I handed him the piece of paper with the letter from Taylor. He flipped open the mirror light and read it as I sat there silently. On the back next to the picture of Taylor Swift it says "Ryan the song is true but I'm not lying anymore. I like you… as more than a friend. I didn't want to make this weird I wanted to stay your friend but I don't think I can do that. I just had to let you know how I feel and see if we could try and be more Lynn."

"Those are great things to remember. I am so proud of you. I think it is awesome how you've branched out, I remember when I had to keep you from backing out. "He smiled. "Uh-huh" I nodded as I played with my necklace, hair anything to not have to look at the boy. "Also I think it's great you've grown so close to Kelsey she's really great isn't she?" a lump came up in my throat "Yeah . Well it's getting late I better go" I quickly got out of the car. "Are you ok?" He called looking worried I put on a quick fake smile and said "Yeah just tired that took a lot out of me I guess..Goodnight" "Well..okay..Goodnight Kaylyn. She couldn't hold on to it and at the night she frowned.

I can't believe it … He doesn't like me as I like him. I can't believe I thought he might. I left the lyrics and Taylor Swift letter in the car but it didn't matter I didn't want a reminder and Ryan was the only reason it mattered anyways. Tears going down my cheeks I went to sleep.

Ryans point of view. I don't' think I can handle seeing Ryan after this. A week later

I thought Sharpay would calm down but she was busy critiquing how both of our performance went how to improve and going on and on. Apparently we are doing a duet completion in a few weeks. I began thinking of last night. It seemed strange Kaylyn had left so quickly. He remembers something … He had said he was so surprised when she had sang a different song but really he had heard her sing it before, when she was practicing with Kelsey for a change. I had listened then being too embarrassed to mention it to her. It had been forgotten about with Sharpay turning into freak out mode that the talent show was soon. He admired it about her, being able to change songs with a week to practice it . Sharpay could never do that.

He loved his sister but she doesn't listen well. Kaylyn listens to him. She has been acting a bit weird. She talked she was worried about the talent show. After all looking back changing songs with a week before going in front of the whole school when you haven't done it before…No she had Kelsey, as well she didn't act that stressed out before. Unless maybe it wasn't just the talent show. Maybe Kelsey was right. Maybe the song was about someone. He then had a hunch he had wanted it to be true…but cursing himself he wondered if he could be right … It seemed like it could fit. She had acted strangely. Surely if it was someone else she would have mentioned him.

The serious talk last night..The letter… the letter! He ran right out of Sharpay talking "Ryan! Ryan, come back here!" She shrieked. He ignored her. He ran to his car and looked past his bookbag to find it. He read it again thinking this fit too. How could he be sure? In frustration he flipped through the song lyrics. The song she sang wasn't in there. Looking at in trying to decode some clue that yes it is true Kaylyn cares for you in that way you care about her.

Suddenly he saw it. On the back was her message. She likes me. I didn't think she liked me. She didn't think I was gay. I knew what I had to do. Kaylyn and Sharpay didn't make it easy. She told me my break was up and dragged me inside. She isn't answering my calls or texts. Sharpay is keeping me busy practicing after school when I could catch Kaylyn and then all the other time she is at cheerleading practice. At school she surrounds herself with her cheerleading friends while they aren't evil as I thought before , still scare me and make it unable to talk with her alone .

I'm not giving up he decided. He did something he thought she would like. Talking about hats once he bought her one he thought she would like. A simple one with a small flower on the side. He stuck a stick through the crack and left it hanging on that in her locker. He noticed later it was gone but yet she still wouldn't talk to him. He had to figure out something else. He would have to call in a few favors but it might work…

Kaylyns point of view

This week has been lonely the only good thing is the girls on the cheerleading squad have really been nice. We've gotten closer. I saw a hat… When I saw it I was shocked. If he thinks he can get over not even talking about how she felt about him. For a week to ignore her then suddenly not was he bipolar or something? But what she didn't expect was the next day to while she was waiting to pick up the kids she babysat at the bus stop. She didn't have her coat she had run out late after some crisis -if you could call it that-from her sister.

My mom had dropped me off and left. When she looked behind her, there was someone she wasn't expecting it wasn't the pesky 8 year old she babysat yet Ryan Evans. She then noticed his car nearby. She wished her cheerleading friends were here but they weren't. She was staring dumbly when without a word he grabbed her wrist and pulled towards his car. Out of reflex she started to follow before she stopped herself. "Hold it what are you doing" She said in disbelief. Embarrased at being in a daze and at first following him, and being close to him , she blushed. "Come on" Ryan said simply. She pulled back only to find he didn't stop but she felt herself like a magnet pulled toward him and his car. This can't happen she thought grimly. I just want this to end.

She felt her resolve strengthen even when he finally spoke more than two words "I'll explain more later." While he was still headed to his car with her wrist in hand. "What are you doing here? Ryan I can't right now. Stop it! Maybe we can talk later." She said quickly. Or maybe later as in when pigs fly..That's when I'll want to talk to you. Didn't he realize she didn't _want_ talk to him? She broke her hold and ran. Callie would have to know to come to the mom's house she babysat. Why the bus was this late she didn't know. She was cold and she didn't want to talk to Ryan anymore.

As she ran she got to the door only to realize not only had she forgotten her jacket but the key to the apartment where she babysat as well. She hoped Callie would know where a spare was. He didn't care about her in that way, why couldn't he just leave her alone? She could babysit, do school, concentrate more with cheerleading and her friends from there and hang out with Kelsey- well unless Ryan started dating her from how great she said she was. She wasn't sure how she would handle that. She liked Kelsey she was a great friend but if she were to date Ryan she wasn't sure she could be friends with either of them. There was still the cheerleaders she wouldn't have time to think about-Ryan. Crap. He followed me, and now I'm locked out.

"Kaylyn?" He asked softly coming quickly. There wasn't much room to run away. She would have to face him. "What do you want Ryan?" I ask tiredly. I thought this was done with that night. "You to quit avoiding me for starters." He said pointedly. I couldn't help but stare at the floor. "Well I don't like feeling like a hot potato one minute we're close talking hanging out one week the next week I never hear from you . Now you're stalking me? The one thing she had remembered in her bag was the hat Ryan had given her. "By the way here's the hat-Thanks but no thanks. Now I have to go babysit so if you'll excuse me Ryan Evans-"

She was interrupted again not long after she pushed past him to try the bus stop again. Why does that always happen she thought. This time Ryan had quickly followed her and stood in front of her blocking her. She looked up at him before quickly looking down at her feet."Kaylyn! First of all you don't have to babysit … let's just say it's taken care off. Look I am sorry I didn't mean to but you didn't help either. Sharpay kept running me ragged some singing contest then you had cheerleading practice. But we need to talk."

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair after taking off his hat. She knew he did that when he was nervous. "I don't get what you said about my babysitting being taken care of ...and about Sharpay I see but I don't think we have anything to talk about." She said sharply "I think we do." He said simply stepping forward causing me to take a step back "Sharpay is teaching Callie and your little sister at my suggestion, singing lessons to look good for college applications. I think she plans on doing it more often as well as resting more I've told her the amount we've been practicing is insane." I gulped loudly "Well that's great …but why did you suggest the singing lessons?" I asked curiously. "Because I wanted to talk to you." He stated taking another step towards me, me gulping and taking another step back my elbow hitting the door.

"About?" I asked getting impatient and wanting to get this over with. He surprised me by taking my hand and looking at it. "Kaylyn I love how you aren't afraid to paint your nails different colors like purple or orange or blue when all the other girls do their French manicure. I love that you are a cheerleader yet can get along with other people too. I love our playful banters back and forth like when we first met and that you love sarcasm." Ryan listed off the things off the top of his head hoping she didn't think they weren't too corny. Kaylyn just stared at him. He went on " I read what you said Kaylyn I didn't at first ,and I like you too ." He said lightness and happiness in his eyes. Oh if only he was saying could be true if only she could have the same look he had. "No…." She shook her head. "No." shaking her head then freeing her hand out of his she pushed past him Ryan so surprised it took him a minute to respond. As she walked away he ran after he trailing her. "It's true Kaylyn all of it."

"I don't believe you. I sang a song for you in front of everyone and it takes you this long to realize how I felt? Why now? You just feel guilty." She gathered her thoughts then calculated what was going on here. "Kaylyn" he groaned grabbing her arm stopping her up short. "It is not because I feel guilty. I've felt this way for a while too." "Too?" Kaylyn asked "Look a hat isn't going to make everything okay. You don't know how much me sharing and you not saying anything and then not talking to me hurt. We can't just be friends again like I know you want to be…" She was interrupted again by Ryan grabbing both sides of her face and kissing her. She tried to pull away but couldn't.

Kaylyn got lost in the moment ...She couldn't get lost in his spell again. He finally pulled back and smiled at her. I am sorry I hurt you because it took me a while to know you felt the same way. It was dumb of me I don't know how I missed it. Once I saw your note I tried to see you. I missed you Lynn and I really care about you." She grabbed the hat he was holding from his hand kissed him and sighed. Maybe the cheerleaders didn't get her humor but she found someone who did. They might think the hat is dorky and not get her. She could have balance hanging out with the cheerleaders and with drama people. In cheerleading you have to have balance. While doing jumps while flying while doing cartwheels. For once she was seeing things through a cheerleaders eyes, and she didn't mind one bit.

So I finally finished it. 3 years later. Sorry for mistakes but did best I could . hope you like it.


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